$12 · 56-minute video · watch anytime

This is a recording, not a live session. When you purchase it, it's yours to return to.

Let me be upfront: this is not a demonstration. There’s no finished piece I was working toward when I sat down. What you’ll watch is color going on, getting covered, getting scratched away. A face emerging from the chaos — not because I planned a face, but because I needed one.

Words appearing, disappearing, getting written over. At one point I get up, look at the page from a distance, sit back down, and add gold. It wasn’t something I could’ve predicted doing.

Somewhere in the middle of the hour I was doing free-writing on the page, illegible, raw. When I finished and looked at what my hand had written, it had landed on three words: as she pleases.

I didn’t plan that. That’s what this kind of making does.

The page in this video is about release — of things held too long, of the version of yourself that other people expect, of the fear that what you make won’t be enough. It’s also about what’'s left when you stop trying to make it be anything in particular.

If you’ve never let yourself make a mess on purpose, this might be the video to start with.